Minister Appreciation Spotlight: Reverend Leela White

I think the way I was raised had a profound influence on my spiritual path. My mother is a devout Catholic, and my father a non-practicing Baptist. Both modeled and fostered deep faith and spirituality. My mother is not dogmatic or rigid. I always refer to her as a “common sense” Catholic. My 12 years at a Catholic school also enhanced a strong foundation of faith and spirituality. I feel very fortunate that I had a positive experience with my Catholic education.

I have always had a relationship with God. I was never without that understanding or knowing. Even as a child, I had my own direct relationship with God, and I remember telling my mother, “I don’t need to go to confession because I talk to Jesus and Mary all the time.” Later, in high school, I told her I wasn't going to be confirmed Catholic. She was accepting of that because she recognized that my faith and spirituality were genuine. Her openness gave me the freedom to continue searching and to trust my own spiritual experience. I also think it helped that I was the sixth child, maybe she was worn down a bit.

In college, I explored various Christian churches, but I still felt there was something more I was seeking. Eventually, I found a Buddhist temple in Maryland led by Jetsunma Akhon Lhamo, an enlightened teacher. Before coming to Yogaville, I actually thought I would complete Integral Yoga Teacher Training and then return to Maryland and pursue becoming Buddhist.

What I was really searching for was a deeper connection with God—one that felt less dogmatic, more open, ecumenical, and accepting.

I had received many brochures from places offering yoga teacher training. When I first learned about the Yogaville training in the fall of 1996, I thought there was no way I could leave for an entire month. But when the Yogaville brochure arrived and I held it in my hands, something shifted immediately. I was so excited that I ran upstairs to my apartment to read every detail. Somehow, I simply knew this was what I was going to do. My belief that I couldn't possibly leave for a month completely disappeared.

Looking back, I feel that Sri Gurudev was already working and calling me home.

The openness and spirituality my parents nurtured in me gave me the freedom to trust my heart, my intuition, and God's guidance. I attended Integral Yoga Teacher Training in March 1996. Sri Gurudev was away during most of the training, so I had not yet met Him, but I was having very profound dreams about him. Then, when he returned and I finally met him, the experience was amazing. I experienced a depth of warmth, love, understanding, and inspiration that I had never felt before in this way.

For me, being an Integral Yoga Minister means seeing life itself as an opportunity to serve. Service is much more expansive than performing one particular role, such as teaching a Raja Yoga course, performing weddings, or conducting Teacher Trainings.

Service can arise in any situation, and it requires discernment. Sometimes I have to put my own preferences or ego aside and look more deeply at what is being asked of me. There are certainly moments when resistance comes up—when I would rather stay comfortable or simply be a little lazy! But being a minister invites me to pause, assess the situation, and ask how I can best serve.

When others might say, “You can't do that—are you crazy?” I often think of Gurudev and ask myself, what would He do in this situation?

Being a minister continues to teach me that service is not limited to what happens in a formal spiritual setting. It is a way of approaching life. It also shows me ways I need to grow and improve.

I feel very fortunate to work with a wonderful group of people at the Charlottesville Psychological Associates in downtown Charlottesville. There are 11 psychotherapists in private practice who work together there, and I truly love both my colleagues and my clients.

It is a privilege to walk alongside people on their journeys—to witness their healing and help them move forward. I learn from my clients every day. Although the work incorporates different psychological and therapeutic modalities, I feel that the grace and wisdom of the Integral Yoga teachings are infused throughout it all.

Integral Yoga is like the rich foundation in a flower bed—it nourishes everything that grows from it. I often ask for and feel Gurudev's presence in my work.

I learned a long time ago that there are many things I can do, but that doesn't necessarily mean I should do them all. When I was younger, I often said yes to everything, became exhausted, and eventually had to pull back. Over time, I have learned to recognize where I can be of the greatest service.

I often remember Gurudev's saying that when you are selfless, you are actually selfish, but a good selfish, because you reap the benefit of your selflessness. The work I do as a psychotherapist is very much like that for me, and I consider it a part of my ministry.

I like to spend time with Bud. We both enjoy being active. We cycle a lot, hike, and I swim. I also enjoy Nia, a cardiovascular dance practice that combines movement, music, and elements of various healing arts. Being active helps keep me balanced and connected to the joy of being in my body and in nature.

I also enjoy time with my family and friends.

Because of my earlier experiences with the Buddhist temple, I continue to value Buddhism and feel an affinity with some of its teachings and practices.

I am also drawn to Nia, which is interesting because it incorporates the essence of several healing arts through movement. For example, it draws inspiration from practices such as Tai Chi, Taekwon-do, and Aikido and integrates those qualities into a cardiovascular dance form.

I appreciate how these practices help me become more present, aware, and connected.

I love Raja Yoga. I honestly feel I could spend lifetimes studying it. I could take the Raja Yoga Teacher Training course again and again, year after year, and each time I would understand something more deeply.

For me, the Yoga Sutras is where I am trying to “dig the deep well” that Gurudev spoke about—rather than continually moving from one thing to another, staying with a practice and going deeply into it.

I also study some of the Bhagavad Gita, and I am taking an online course with Swamis Ramananda and Dhivyananda which is helping me dive more deeply into the sutras and slokas. I love discovering how teachings I may have heard before can reveal an entirely new level of meaning when I return to them at a different point in my life.

I would love to learn more about managing finances. Earlier in life, once I discovered my love for psychology, I moved away from that area of interest. I would enjoy learning more about investments as well as property management.

I also enjoy things that allow me to organize, plan, and connect with people. One of my favorite jobs was when I first moved to Yogaville in 1997 and worked at ARC, the Ashram Reservations Center. I loved taking reservations, talking with people on the phone, and then sometimes meeting those same people when they arrived at the Ashram. There was something very satisfying about helping people feel welcomed and connected, and we shared a common purpose in Gurudev.

I would also love to spend more time with plants and learn to paint with watercolors. There are always more things calling to me than there seems to be time for!

One of the things I notice most often is how hard people can be on themselves. I want to help them recognize that they already have wisdom within them. Often, they need support in becoming quiet and clear enough to hear it.

I hope to help people reach that place of inner peace where the heart and mind become aligned. From there, they can begin to discover their own priorities and make choices that are more authentic to who they are.

In relationships, I believe healing also requires accepting people for who they are. We may want someone to change or to work harder to improve a relationship, but they may have limitations or may simply not be willing to do that work. Part of our own growth is learning what we can and cannot control.

Forgiveness seems to be a challenge for many. I encourage people to consider the cost of holding onto a grudge. We have to ask ourselves: What is this resentment costing me? Is it worth the price? Sometimes forgiveness or letting go isn't primarily about the other person—it is about freeing ourselves.

My relationship with God and Guru is most important to me. And for me, that relationship is reflected in how I feel about myself and how I relate to the people I love.

That is ongoing work and it can be hard work. I can look back and see times when I could have done things differently, better—when perhaps I could have been kinder, more patient, understanding, and even more accountable. Spiritual growth doesn't mean believing we have done everything perfectly. It means being willing to honestly reflect, learn, and keep growing.

In the end, love and the quality of our relationships are what matter most to me.

I think the next step is whatever is right in front of me.

My work, my family, and all the ordinary experiences of daily life offer plenty of opportunities for spiritual growth. I also want to be increasingly available to my aging parents. I know there are rich spiritual lessons in that experience—lessons I may not even recognize yet.

I don't necessarily feel that spiritual growth is somewhere far away or something I have to go searching for. Much of it is right here, in how I respond to the people and circumstances that life places before me.

I would wish for everyone to find their own peace and joy—and then to share that peace and joy with others.

We all go through challenges. Sometimes we feel buried beneath them, and other times life feels light and beautiful. Through all of it, I believe we can remember that the Light is always present and available to us, especially when we need it most.

And if we can do even one thing to help someone who is suffering, that matters. We often touch people's lives more deeply than we realize.

Perhaps that is one of the most important things we can remember: the Light is always there, and every act of kindness has the power to carry that Light to someone else.